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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28000275">The Last Card</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/xfandomwritingsx/pseuds/xfandomwritingsx'>xfandomwritingsx</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supernatural</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Death, F/M, Sadness, You're dead, agnst, no happy ending, of you to be specific</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 19:19:47</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>827</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28000275</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/xfandomwritingsx/pseuds/xfandomwritingsx</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>You manage to send Dean one more Christmas card.</p><p>Christmas Prompt: Christmas Cards</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Dean Winchester/Reader, Dean Winchester/You</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Last Card</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p></p><div class="">
  <p>You had always loved Christmas. It didn’t matter where you were or who you were with. You made sure to celebrate Christmas. There were some years Dean loved it and some years he wished you’d just let it die. He always scoffed when he saw you writing out Christmas cards. If you didn’t have a desk or a table, you’d curl up on a motel bed or in the backseat of the Impala and write them on your knees. You were determined to get them out every year. And without fail, he always received one. It didn’t even matter if you were with him on Christmas. He still got a card; in the mail if possible and if not, then on his pillow.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>This year, as Christmas draws closer, Dean finds himself getting ever the more somber. The sight of colorful lights just drain him dry and the very idea of pulling out the Christmas boxes in the bunker make him not want to get out of bed in the morning.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Fuck, does he miss you. So much that it hurts.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He sits at the bunker’s table, still in his robe and gently swirling his coffee in a mug and staring blankly at it. Colors dull. Food tasteless. Maybe he should just go back to bed. Before he can, Sam comes in cautiously, eyes red and slightly puffy.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Dean,” he calls gently. He’s got an envelope that he awkwardly shuffles from hand to hand. When Dean looks up, he notices his name written on the envelope between the slots of Sam’s fingers. And he recognizes that handwriting as yours. His heart clenches up and there’s a rush of anger that fills him simply because he’s so damn tired of the pain. “She wanted me to give you this.”</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“Fuck,” he groans, hanging his head down as though if he didn’t look at it, it would simply vanish.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“I promised her.” He says it apologetically and steps forward to hand him what he already knows is going to be a Christmas card you wrote prior to…</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>“God damn it,” Dean swears as he swipes the envelope angrily. Sam backs up quietly, running his hands over his face and not bothering to try to say anything else as he leaves.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>Dean stares at the plain white envelope and turns it over a few times, trying to bring himself to open it. The pain is too fresh, too visceral to let go. Everyone they ever lost hurt, but you were different. Losing you, watching the light go out in your eyes as he held you, it nearly took him out. How can he just open a card from you like nothing happened?</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He fights back the tears. Fights back the anger enough that he doesn’t rip the envelope to shreds as he opens it.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>The card has an artist’s painting on the front; a cottage blanketed in snowfall in the midst of the night. Warm light spilling from the windows and a harsher light from a street lamp illuminating the cobbled path of a drive. He wonders if you got lost in the image when you picked it out, if you fell into the scene and felt at home. He wonders if that’s where you wanted to end up. Perhaps that’s where you imagined he and you retiring to. You had deserved that.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>And instead you got put on a pyre and your ashes in a hole in the ground.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>His hands shake as he opens the card. Save for a large <em>Happy Holidays! </em>printed in fancy script, the rest of the card was left blank and filled in with your own writing. He closes his eyes and sighs deeply, bracing himself to read what you wrote.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>Dean,</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>Here’s to hoping for another year where you never get this card. I’ve written one every year “just in case” and have never needed to do anything but throw them away. Fingers crossed for another good year!</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>But I suppose if you’ve got this in hand then something happened and Sam followed his strict instructions to make sure you get this. You didn’t think I’d let you go without a card this year, did you? I know sometimes you hate the Christmas spirit but I can’t help it. Even when you’re being a dick about it, there’s that little twinkle behind your eye and I know there’s a part of you that loves it.</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>Don’t let that go. Keep that little glimmer of hope and happiness. Put that smile on your face for me and drink the eggnog spiked a little too hard.</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>I love you Dean. Just… never forget that. I love you.</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>
    <em>And Merry Christmas.</em>
  </p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>He breaks down. Tears streaming down his face and sobs wracking his body. He doesn’t know how he’s going to be okay. He doesn’t know how he’s ever going to be able smile or enjoy anything without you.</p>
</div><div class="">
  <p>But he’ll try. For you, he’ll try.</p>
</div>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>If you don't know, I'm doing a Christmas Prompt list. One prompt for a different character each day in December.<br/>You can find said list here: https://xfandomwritingsx.tumblr.com/post/635261161214984193/ashleys-2020-december-prompts</p><p>As always, if you’re really feeling generous, buy me a coffee! https://ko-fi.com/writerashley<br/>Keep up with my progress on Instagram! https://www.instagram.com/thatfandomwriter/</p></blockquote></div></div>
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